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    CORPORATE LESSONS


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    CORPORATE LESSON #1:

    ____________ _________ _________ _

    A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is
    Finishing up her shower when the doorbell rings. After a few
    Seconds of arguing over which one should go and answer the
    Doorbell,

    The wife gives up, quickly wraps herself up in a towel
    And runs

    Downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob,
    The next door
    Neighbor.

    Before she says a word, Bob says, "I'll give you $800
    Just to

    Drop that towel that you have on". After thinking for
    A moment,

    The woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of
    Bob.

    Bob has a close look at her for a few seconds, hands
    Over $800 and
    Quietly leaves.

    Confused, but excited about her good fortune, the
    Woman wraps

    Back up in the towel and goes upstairs. When she gets
    Back to

    The bathroom, her husband asks from the shower "Who
    Was that?"

    "It was Bob the next door neighbor," she replies.

    "Great," the husband says, "did he say anything about
    The $800
    He owes me?"

    ____________ _________ _________ _

    MORAL OF THE STORY:

    ____________ _________ _________ _

    Share critical credit infrmation with your
    Stakeholders to
    Prevent
    Avoidable exposure!

    ** * * * ***
    ____________ _________ _________ _

    CORPORATE LESSON # 2

    ____________ _________ _________ _

    A priest was driving along and saw a nun on the side
    Of the road,

    He stopped and offered her a lift which she gladly
    Accepted. She

    Got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to open
    And reveal a lovely
    Leg.

    The priest had a look and nearly had an accident.
    After controlling

    The car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The
    Nun looked at

    Him and immediately said, "Father, remember psalm
    129?"

    The priest was flustered and apologized profusely.

    He forced himself to remove his hand. However, he was
    Unable to
    Remove his eyes from her leg.

    Further on, while changing gear, he let his hand slide
    Up her
    Leg again. The nun once again said, "Father, remember
    Psalm
    129?"

    Once again the priest apologized. "Sorry sister, but
    The mind is weak."

    Arriving at the convent, the nun got out, gave him a
    Meaningful
    Glance and went on her way. On his arrival at the
    Church, the
    Priest rushed to retrieve a bible and looked up psalm
    129.

    It Said,"Go forth and seek; further up, you will find
    Glory."

    ____________ _________ _________ _

    MORAL OF THE STORY:
    ____________ _________ _________ _

    Always be well informed in your job; or, you might
    Miss great Opportunities!

    ** * * * ***
    ____________ _________ _________ _

    CORPORATE LESSON # 3

    ____________ _________ _________ _

    There were these 4 guys, a Russian, a German, an
    American and a
    French, who found this small genie bottle. When they
    Rubbed the
    Bottle, a genie appears.

    Thankful that the 4 guys had
    Released him
    Out of the bottle, he said, "Next to you all are 4
    Swimming pools,

    I will give each of you a wish. When you run towards
    The pool and
    Jump, you shout What you want the pool of water to
    Become, then
    Your wish will come true."

    The French wanted to start. He ran towards the pool,
    Jumped and
    Shouted WINE". The pool immediately changed into a
    Pool of wine.

    The Frenchman was so happy swimming and drinking from
    The pool.

    Next is the Russian's turn, he did the same and
    Shouted, "VODKA"
    And immersed himself into a pool of vodka.

    The German was next and he jumped and shouted, "BEER".
    He was so
    Contented with his beer pool.

    The last is the American. He was running towards the
    Pool when
    Suddenly he steps on a banana peel. He slipped towards
    The pool
    And shouted, "SH** !!!!!!!..... ...."

    ____________ _________ _________ _

    MORAL OF THE STORY:

    ____________ _________ _________ _

    Mind your language, you never Know what it will land
    You in.

    ** * * * ***

    ____________ _________ _________ _

    CORPORATE LESSON # 4

    ____________ _________ _________ _

    A young executive was leaving the office at 6 PM when
    He found
    The CEO standing in front of a shredder with a piece
    Of paper
    In his hand.

    "Listen," said the CEO, "this is a very sensitive and
    Important

    Document and my secretary has left. Can you make this
    Thing
    Work?"

    "Certainly, Sir" said the young executive. He turned
    The machine
    On, inserted the paper, and pressed the start button.

    "Excellent, excellent!" said the CEO as his paper
    Disappeared inside
    The machine."I just need one copy."

    ____________ _________ _________ _

    MORAL OF THE STORY:

    ____________ _________ _________ _

    Never, never assume that your BOSS knows everything.

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